5 AM at the Stores?

Honestly! Apparently people are willing to get up at 4 AM to go to the store for a bargain. I had a cousin like that. He would spring for just about anything -- as long as it was on sale. "See how much I saved!" he would gloat. Never mind he would have saved even more if he hadn't bought it at all.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for getting a bargain. In fact, I'll troll the Internet looking for bargains -- but only for something I already need or want. Maybe I'm an anacronysm, but I never go "shopping" -- I don't just head out to a store or surf the web just to see what's available. On the other hand, once I have a purchase in mind, I'll walk the aisles to see if there's anything else I can't live without. But not at 5 AM. There's only one thing that gets me out of a warm bed at 5 AM -- the urgent need to relieve myself.

Oh, I've gotten up regularly at or before 5 AM. I detassled corn as a kid. I spent 28 years in the Navy. We had three kids. But now, in the gathering twilight of my life, getting up before dawn requires something in the nature of a life emergency. Anything less will wait at least until 7:30.

Enjoy your early morning bargains, folks. I'll be sleeping.